Events this week have conspired to show me, if I needed showing, that I'm nowhere near as tough as I once was. Professional confrontation with a colleague at work, something that I wouldn't normally think twice over, had me in emotional and physical knots. I hadn't felt as physically bad since 'that day'. The tension and upset triggered inside me from any confrontational events these days is a physical fact I can't ignore. I really can't afford to get angry. I found myself battling with myself internally, balancing reason against panic, telling myself it's just the upset, nothing more serious. I'm still here, I didn't worry anyone else but myself, so I guessed right. I don't want to experience that again, so the answer is clear: distance myself from such sources of stress. I don't need it. Time for a holiday.
Tuesday, 14 May 2013
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